Barefoot Blue Jean Night

I wish I could wakeboard like that.

Weekend Lesson

My cat had me up at 3 AM yesterday.  I'm pretty sure that while I was outside on the beach with him, in the dark, I was falling asleep standing up.  If my cat does that to me, and I don't really like to handle it, then I'm almost 100 percent sure that babies are a no go for me.  I don't do the "get up at the crack of dawn" routine every day.  I tell you, I get the least amount of sleep at Bear Lake because my cat bites my legs to let me know when he thinks it is time for me to get up.

For the most part, I enjoy being up at Bear Lake.  I'm not really a people person, so I don't like large groups up there, but I am okay with some family.  My cousin J.J. came up for the first time in a couple of years.  It was fun to have him up again.  What isn't fun is fighting with my mom.  Maybe it was because we had so many people up there--people make me cranky--when I wanted a relaxing weekend pretty much free of hosting.  I don't know.  Still, I fought with her more this weekend than I have in a few months.  I'm used to this kind of interaction with my mom; for a long time it was the only way we could communicate anything at all.  But I don't like it.  When we fight like we did on the way home from Bear Lake, I seriously consider moving back to Provo early just so I can get out of her hair.  Then I get some sense knocked into me and decide that I need to stay, because I'm going to fight with whomever I live with, and I can't always just up and leave, so I need to learn to live with the people I'm going to fight with.

So why don't I just try and be nice and ease the situation?  Half the time I don't even expect my mom to get angry over what I'm doing, saying, or both.  And usually I don't feel like I'm out of line, so I'll yell right back at her.  When I do realize that I'm out of line, I've tried the apologizing route.  That works less than half the time to get rid of the coming argument.  So, I just decide to nearly always stick to my guns, even if I'm in the wrong, until after she's cooled her jets.  And this is probably really bad, but many times I'm too prideful to apologize.  I probably should apologize, even if I'm in the right.  Agree to disagree, you know?

I grew up learning to watch what I said.  Keep my opinions to myself, you know?  As I get older I'm finding this thing is harder to do.  With family, friends, and people that annoy me.  This is a problem, because it puts me well on my way to ostracizing my family and friends.  I mean, I really don't have THAT many people that I really call friends--more just acquaintances--and the couple that have stayed with me probably will keep on staying, because I've already been mean and they've stayed.  I've never been a people person, ever.  I don't have to change that, but I do need to start keeping my opinions to myself again, because in order to function in society, I have to keep my mouth shut.

And that's what I've learned from this weekend at Bear Lake.

The Concert

Yesterday I got to go to an awesome concert with my friend Emily Trujillo.  I don't usually go to concerts.  I'm too cheap to pay for the tickets.  I won the tickets to the Grace Potter and the Nocturnals concert from a 99.5 radio contest.  On my way down to West Valley to get the tickets, I got another call.  I was selected to meet Grace Potter!  Which was awesome.  Emily and I were the only two there that got to meet her.  She was really nice, and tall.  I'm in heels in the picture, and she's still taller than me, and she wasn't in heels!  

And yes, they sound the same in concert as they do on their records, if not better.  If Grace Potter and the Nocturnals come back to SLC, you can count me in for going to their concert.  For my first concert at the Gallivan Center, it was fantastic.

So, introducing Grace Potter and the Nocturnals!

My favorite songs:

Apologies

Joey

Medicine

The Fun and the Ugly

As I said in my last post, I've been gone to Bear Lake for the past two weeks.  A lot has happened in those last two weeks.  I think I'll start with June 30th, the day before we left, and move on from there.  

My Dad was released as Bishop of the YSA 7th Ward about a month ago.  He was called to the high council in the Ogden YSA 2nd Stake.  My Mom was called to the same stake as a relief society adviser.  I figured I would just go to the ward they went to so I could go to church with family.  So, on Thursday the 30th, I decided to go to the ward BBQ with my parents.  The food was good, the company wasn't.  About five minutes there, and in walks my ex-husband.  I managed to stay for most of the time so my parents could get to know kids (although when my Dad saw my ex, he asked me if we needed to leave).  Nik never spoke to me, but he knew I was there.

I was pretty upset when we got home, and it showed when I was helping my Dad hook the flatbed trailer to his truck.  My parents told me I could just go in and relax, that they could handle the rest (my cousin Bailey was there to help them, too).  I went in and worked on the 1500 piece puzzle that has been up for months.  My cousin walks in not five minutes later and says, "You have a visitor."

I was surprised, looked up, and asked, "Who?"

Nik walked in the room.  "Me!"

I looked back down at my puzzle.  I was so angry that I was sick to my stomach.  When I get emotionally stressed, I usually don't cry or freak out.  That stress exhibits itself through physical pain.  My family, either my Mom, my Dad, or Bailey, was there with me the whole time he was.  Still, he wouldn't leave!  Two hours later, I'm still standing over my puzzle, not speaking to him, hoping he'll leave.  What makes him think he has the right to come see me anyway?  He asked if I'd be around.  I told him I'd be at Bear Lake for most of the summer, and then in New York.

At about 11:30 PM, my ex-husband says, "Oh, well, I guess I'll go now.  But Chelsea, I want to talk to you, so will you walk out with me?"

Absolutely NOT! is what I was thinking, but I walked out with him.  He told me he missed hanging out with me.  I don't miss hanging with you.  He said he didn't want me as his wife anymore, but he wanted me as a friend. I don't want you for a friend.  GET OUT OF MY LIFE!


"And um, I never said sorry to you.  I was a real jerk."

"I know."

"You agree with me?"

"Well, I wasn't going to offer it, but if you're going to say it, I'm not going to disagree with you."

My Mom yelled out the front door that someone was on the phone for me.  I thought, Who's calling me at 11:30?  She must be just trying to get me away from Nik.


I said bye to Nik, and he said, "See you around!"

I turned around, and at this point so much profanity has run through my brain that if I look back I'm afraid it will all come out.  I pride myself on being able to keep my temper.  There's few people that ever bring the worst out in me.  Up until Nik, I didn't know that kind of fury existed.  I walked in the house.   I was sick for the next two days.

We went up to Bear Lake the next day.  I calmed down from the previous night's incident.  Nik wouldn't follow me up here.  I'm safe from him.  So, the weekend went well, as did the week after it.  I've got some fun pictures of people from up there.  My Dad has this really nice Nikon camera, and I used it a lot, but then the SD card got corrupted somehow, so we've got to send it in so I can get all my pictures back.  When that happens, I'll post those pictures.  I have some pictures on my little digital camera, though, that are pretty fun, and I'll post as the highlight of this post, because there's another downer part coming.

Jason Jr., my cousin Page's kid.  He's only one, but look how big he is!

Tajsha, my cousin's other kid.  Tajsha will be three in September.

Junior on the boat for the first time.

When we went four wheeling, we encountered a wall of snow that we couldn't get around. 

So much for going to Gators in Randolph for lunch!

Snow is all over on the mountaintops.

Flowers on the road.

Mom and Bailey

The mountainside.

Bailey after the ride.

Bailey and Mom after the ride, all dirty.

Me after the ride.  You can barely tell I went, I didn't really get dusty leading the pack.

The view from our house.

A chipmunk at Minnetonka Cave.

In Minnetonka Cave.

Me and Bailey after the tour.  She'd never been in a cave before.

And guys, she's fourteen, so back off...

Then Friday came, and Bailey and I decided to make jewelry.  She was beading, and I was working on a chain mail bracelet, when I heard, "Hey guys, what's up?"  I knew the voice, but I hoped I was just dreaming.  Nope, it was Nik.  He decided to drive up to Bear Lake so he could "take me to lunch."  See, the thing about that is, I'd already told him over both email and the phone that it would never be okay for him to take me to lunch, ever.  I thought I'd sent that message very clearly.  Apparently, not.

I nearly finished my bracelet, and then changed into decent clothing (at this point I was still in pajamas).  My Mom said, "Why don't you take Witter (my cat, Lex) on a walk down the beach?  He's been wanting to go all  morning."  Side note, yes, I do take my cat up to Bear Lake with me.  He doesn't really care for the car ride (what cat does?) but he loves it once he gets to our cabin.

Well, my Mom told Nik he should go walk with me.  We went for an hour, and no more than twenty sentences were spoken, and most of them were voiced by him.  He told me he missed Bear Lake.  I told him I knew he missed the lifestyle my family afforded him.  That shut him up for awhile.  I called the kettle black.  On our walk, he picked up a stick, and then broke it up into small pieces and started throwing them at my cat!  I was really angry, and I'm pretty sure it showed, because when he saw my face he stopped throwing them until later.  The fact that he even threw another stick at Lex again after a few minutes should be a testament to how thick my ex-husband can be.

We got back to the cabin, and I tethered Lex and sat outside on a picnic table.  He finally asked, "You really think that I miss the lifestyle your family afforded me?"

"Yeah."

"Well, I don't miss it.  I'm happy with my life."

"I hope you are.  I hope you get your life put back together."

"It is put back together."

"Okay."

"So, do you want to go to lunch?"

"No."

"Oh, okay."

"You realize that the first time I told you no--over the phone--that meant no, never?"

"Well, yeah."

"Then what's all this?  You know you're never going to win me back."

At this point he got a little upset, and said, "Chelsea, I was done trying to win you back the moment I started dating Andrea."

Andrea is his ex-girlfriend now.

"Good." I said.

And that was pretty much it.  We went inside, and he talked a little longer.  I told him that the best place to get a shake in Garden City was still Hometown Drive In, and he left.  So, he drove 2 1/2 hours to come talk to me for 1 1/2, and then get a shake and drive back.  I hope he's learned his lesson.

The rest of the day was nice, however.  We went on a boat ride, and I got ridiculously sunburned.  Most of me is now tan, but there's still a bright red spot on my chest that I think is just going to peel and not tan. Oh well.  Next time I'll know to apply that 90 SPF once every two hours instead of once every four.  Saturday was full of Waverunner riding, tubing, and packing things up to leave.

Overall, it was a good trip.  I got to tan, eat good food, play in the water, oh, and I forgot to mention light some fireworks.  Then there was crocheting, watching good shows and introducing Bailey to Pinky and the Brain and the Animaniacs, laughing with family, and making jewelry.

And what else besides write this awful long post did I do today?  I made Rosemary Lemon Chicken, Rosemary Lemon Thyme Potatoes, and a Garden Salad with an herb dressing.  Tomorrow, I'm going to make a Kiwi Lime Sorbet.  I'm going to make some more mint lemonade, too.  And I plan on trying to make a Mango Sorbet and a Lemon Sorbet.  So, if you read to the end of this long post, good for you, you got to read a list of the yummy stuff I've made and will make.

And Megan, if you took the time to read all this after already hearing the narrative, bless your heart.  I'm sure that the written narrative was much easier to read, and follow, because it was minus all the profanity.

Update on Resolutions 6

I realize that this is ridiculously late coming, but I was really enjoying myself at Bear Lake for the last couple of weeks.  So, here goes.

2.  After Spring Term, I have a 3.39.  If I do well next semester I should soar past my 3.4 GPA goal.

11.  I've eaten really well since I've been home.  I'm pretty sure this is because I can cook what I want on my parents' dime, and they eat really well, too, so I never go hungry.

20.  I read One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich by Alekzandr Solzhenitsyn (thank you Vladimir Falk for the recommendation) and Thief of Time by Terry Pratchett.

Since it has been so late in coming, I'm just going to keep this one short and sweet, mainly because I can't remember stuff.  So, there you go!