A Long Hiatus, but Back because Reminded

I saw my best friend Megan this last week because it was her sister Erin's wedding (wonderful wedding, wonderful people!) and she mentioned that I hadn't updated my blog in a long time. Well, that's mostly because of two things: a) dance and school and work (yes, I got into grad school at Weber State and got hired there as an adjunct to teach English 1010) and b) I utilize wordpress now more than anything, and I have a craft blog where I do my updates for that. So I haven't even thought to update anything. But there have been several big things that I feel like I want to say, but that I hate to say very publicly (as in FB) because there are people that would feel bad or hurt about it.

But first: goals update.

1: I've been trying to communicate with people better, especially when it's pertinent. The problem has become for me, is there any way to determine the best time to communicate the things that are pertinent? More on this in a minute.

2: Because I'm in graduate school, the idea is to get something, or actually somethings, published and so you look good for PhD programs when you're finished with graduate school. So, this semester I'm trying to write a killer paper to get into a conference, and I'm also going to be writing a book review to hopefully get published. We'll see how it goes.

3: My job isn't full time, really, but I'm teaching in college. And it's paying for my college. And paying me on top of that. Can I ask for better right now, really?

4: I read one philosophy book off my list and bought a few more, but Randall Munroe's What If book is currently taking up all my time. He's the guy who writes XKCD, in case you didn't know.

5: HAHAHAHAHA I'm never going to be good at exercising.

Now, onto the rest.

Some of you know I was dating someone semi-seriously. His name is Jeremy. You may have noticed the was. This is why I asked the question I asked about #1. He had been pretty aloof, and then one night I went to kiss him goodbye and he pushed me away, then asked me to call him when I got home. I told him, "Well, thanks for the good times," because I knew he was going to break up with me there, or end things, or whatever you want to call it, but he said, "Won't there be more good times?" Instead of confronting him right there and making him communicate with me, I went home crying. Then I called him before I got home to talk, and that's when he decided to tell me he was no longer interested and that I shouldn't be upset because we were never exclusive, and that the reason he was leaving was because he wasn't happy with me (and hadn't been for months, apparently) and because I obviously had too much skin in the game.

I was distraught, and then told him a bunch of things I thought and had thought. I spent the next few days crying and angry, and then told him we couldn't be friends (which hasn't really worked out the way I thought because I still see him all the time at dances and I decided to work with him to create a blues dance lesson series, which is more of a business relationship, but one he takes advantage of for friendship, and me too on occasion, if I'm being honest), and it caught him off guard, because he thought it could just go back to the way it was before I'd been his girl. When he keeps trying to break ground rules I've set, it leaves me sad. Also, wondering why it is that he couldn't just be straightforward and break up with me in person. Am I really that scary that he has to make sure I'm miles away before he tells me?

Today was his birthday. I couldn't help myself: I made him a card and some roasted pumpkin seeds and thought I'd ask him if he wanted to grab dessert for his birthday so I could give them to him. He said thanks, but that he had already met with [insert girl's name here] for lunch and he probably didn't want to. But thanks anyways. So I was hurt. I wasn't important enough to want to spend time with. But he had to meet me on my birthday and by me dessert and make me work on an image I didn't want to work on and be with someone I didn't want to be with on my birthday because I had certain expectations for how we would spend my birthday and those weren't going to happen now. But no, he gets to say no to me because it all has to work the way he wants it. So it leads me back to the same hurtful questions:

1. If he wasn't happy with me, how much of the relationship is a lie because I was happy and he was faking?
2. If he was never romantically involved with me (in his mind) then why did he decide to lead me on by doing all those romantic things with me?
3. Was I, and have I always been, just someone he saw as useful and figured it would be good to get me personally invested so I'd stick around?
4. Does he just not see how much his actions continually hurt me?

And I want to ask him these questions all the time. But the couple of times I've tried to ask him he skirts around the questions with the answer of: "Me telling you why this relationship, which wasn't even exclusive, is no longer working for me isn't going to change anything. You trying to talk about this isn't going to fix it. I can't give you any closure, because I don't see that this is a permanent thing, and just because it's ending now doesn't mean it won't pick back up in the future." Which is essentially him telling me, in my mind, I want to try out another girl right now, but when it doesn't work, I'll come pick you up off that shelf I put you on just now, so don't go anywhere. I might want you again as a rebound.

And it makes me feel worthless and sick. Sick because I felt happy for the last year and a half with him. Sick because I had healing moments with him that now I feel like could have easily meant nothing to him. Sick because I question the legitimacy of those healing moments now. Sick because I shared intimate things with him I haven't shared with anyone and now he has that as ammunition if he really wanted (although my rational mind knows he wouldn't do that). Sick because the last year of my life is possibly a lie. Sick because the first man I've ever felt like I could truly say loved me actually didn't have any feelings for me. Sick because I told that man I loved him and it was really scary, and it turned out he didn't care. Sick because it's been a month since he did this to me and I still cry at least once a week over it.

I've been trying to stay busy with a lot of things to keep happy, but it's the hours I'm alone that it makes me sad. Want to see what I wrote in the birthday card? I thought a lot about it, and I heard two Doctor Who quotes from this latest season that really fit what I wanted to say to him, so I just used them:

Jeremy, 

I know I’m breaking my own rules, but since you’re never finished with anyone while they can still make you angry, I guess I figured we’ve got some more interacting to do. I mean, hatred is too strong an emotion to waste on someone you don’t like, right? So, here’s to seeing what another year of interaction brings. And for God’s sake, don’t stop dressing well just because I’m not around to choose what looks best on you. Happy birthday. We’re still not dancing.

Love, 

Chelsea

Not dancing is one of my rules that's probably going to have to stay for a long time. I cry after every time I dance with him. Which is bad if you're driving home at night. Or driving period. And I can't say I don't feel hate almost every day I think of my favorite memories and realize that he probably didn't feel anything like what I was feeling. 

I don't know. Should I feel angry and upset? Or should I just take the moments as what I felt and be happy I actually, for the first time since I got divorced, was able to open up to someone and enjoy life in love for a year and a half? Probably the last one, and maybe eventually I'll get there. I'm just really upset now. So you may see me post memories or frustrations or random things and thoughts here as I progress through this. It seems to be what I did here for my divorce, so why not just continue to post life realizations here? Don't see why not. Then I'll have THREE BLOGS! My blues dance blog, my craft blog, and this. Guess it's not too crazy, right?

Also, a parting thought from Doctor Who: “You only find out what someone thinks of you when you find out what lies they’ve told you.”

Yumminess and a Friend

I have an awesome best friend that comes over and watches Sherlock with me while doing puzzles and then in between all that makes cake balls with me. We were up till past midnight making them. And they were sooo yummy. We don't get together all the time, but that doesn't matter. If one of us doesn't feel like doing something, we don't mind. There are always other times to hang out. And when we do hang out, we always seem to end up doing puzzles and watching movies.

Megan wasn't exactly thrilled that I was taking her picture. It was ridiculously late, after all.

So here's to my one great friend from my hometown, who has stayed friends with me no matter what.

This weekend she took time out of her horribly busy schedule to go get churros with me. Actually, Taco Time was out of churros, so we got empenadas instead. And she bought mine for me. She's an awesome friend.

The Annual Carve

Every year my best friend Megan and I get together and carve pumpkins.  This is the first year in a long time we've been able to carve outside!  We were so happy it wasn't ridiculously cold and snowing.  My dad manned the camera this time round.  

The List

I just watched this show called Beauty & The Briefcase.  It was a good show, albeit an ABC Family cheesy show.  I've been into watching Netflix streaming movies.  I've watched a couple ABC Family ones now, including My Future Boyfriend.  I also watched According to Greta.  That was a good one, not ABC Family, but still really good.  Back on point.  I realize that this post hasn't made a move toward a point yet.  It's getting there.

Most people I know--girls and guys--have a list.  I mean, everyone makes lists, but this is The List.  The qualities for a partner list.  I've yet to meet a girl that hasn't had one.  My friend Megan and I used to joke around in junior high with mottos such as "foreign is better," "foreign + guitar = hot," and "nice guys finish last."  I still have a note full of the sayings that she came up with.  I know we worked on some together, but her ability to turn a phrase is amazing.  Always has been, always will be.  Actually, I don't really know that I've ever sat down and asked her what her serious list is.  Before I got married, I was pretty shallow.  The list was one, foreign, two, good looking, three, smart.  I'm sure there were more, but those are the main ones I remember.  Maybe they're the ones I remember because I think that they define how shallow of a person I can be.

And I took a breath, and I got my hot, smart foreign guy--and I ruined my life.

So, how do these last two paragraphs tie in with the first one?  Well, Beauty & The Briefcase had to do with finding the right guy.  Finding the guy that met everything on her list.  And she gets a guy in the end, but he has zero out of ten of the qualities on The List.  The guy that met the qualities on The List, that she falls in love with in the middle of the show, was a complete liar.  He pretended to be what she wanted so he could get in bed with her.

That's how stupid we are.  We all want some dream match; the love of fairy-tales.  It doesn't exist.  Real love is hard, and you have to work at it every day if you want it to last.  You can't lie your way through it, and the qualities that you're looking for are often you lying to yourself about what you want.

If you never tell the truth about yourself when you meet someone you like, you're headed for trouble.  I know everyone always says that.  I don't think everyone who says that has experience like mine to back it up.  If you're honest with the someone you want to date, then if that someone really likes you, he/she will like you for your honesty.

Get rid of The List.  If you must have The List, let only two things be on it.  One, he/she is the same religion as you.  Two, he/she has the same morals as you.  These two things, I believe, could be grouped into one if you want.  However, just because someone shares the same religion as you doesn't mean that they share the same morals.  Example, my aforementioned marriage.

There have been men who have come and gone in my life that weren't foreign or hot, but who shared my values and treated me well.  And I let that slide because I had a list of what I thought was important.  I've missed chances I should have taken.

What now?  There are guys that I want to be friends with.  Just friends.  I am just socially awkward enough that I don't know how to initiate friendship without making men think I'm hitting on them.  Realistically, I realize that I can probably only ever be friends with the guys in my community.  I believe I had my chance, and I botched it.  I'd still like to associate with guys.  I'm fantastic at not doing well at that.

And in my dream world, I'd like to date a certain someone.  I want a guy to come in and sweep me off my feet.  To let me know that it doesn't matter that I've been married before.  That he still thinks I'm the most beautiful woman in the world, and it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks.  He doesn't have to have any particular qualities.  I believe that what most people would call a spark, is all it'd take.

My dating life is a no-go, though.  If I'm just socially awkward enough to have trouble in the friendship field, I'm running from the cops in the dating field.  I make every mistake possible.  I'm sure I break all the laws of initiating a relationship.  I blush.  I sound like an idiot.  I stare.  I try being a bit forward.  Then I back off.  I stop talking to the guy.  I avoid said guy because he never asks me out, and things are unavoidably awkward because I think he knows I like him and would like to date him.  Obviously he doesn't want to date me.  A bit of despair.

Thank goodness I was able to get away from that last bit by actually running away home for a couple months.  We'll come to the "what happens when you get back to Provo and see him again" bridge when we have to cross it.

The Fun and the Ugly

As I said in my last post, I've been gone to Bear Lake for the past two weeks.  A lot has happened in those last two weeks.  I think I'll start with June 30th, the day before we left, and move on from there.  

My Dad was released as Bishop of the YSA 7th Ward about a month ago.  He was called to the high council in the Ogden YSA 2nd Stake.  My Mom was called to the same stake as a relief society adviser.  I figured I would just go to the ward they went to so I could go to church with family.  So, on Thursday the 30th, I decided to go to the ward BBQ with my parents.  The food was good, the company wasn't.  About five minutes there, and in walks my ex-husband.  I managed to stay for most of the time so my parents could get to know kids (although when my Dad saw my ex, he asked me if we needed to leave).  Nik never spoke to me, but he knew I was there.

I was pretty upset when we got home, and it showed when I was helping my Dad hook the flatbed trailer to his truck.  My parents told me I could just go in and relax, that they could handle the rest (my cousin Bailey was there to help them, too).  I went in and worked on the 1500 piece puzzle that has been up for months.  My cousin walks in not five minutes later and says, "You have a visitor."

I was surprised, looked up, and asked, "Who?"

Nik walked in the room.  "Me!"

I looked back down at my puzzle.  I was so angry that I was sick to my stomach.  When I get emotionally stressed, I usually don't cry or freak out.  That stress exhibits itself through physical pain.  My family, either my Mom, my Dad, or Bailey, was there with me the whole time he was.  Still, he wouldn't leave!  Two hours later, I'm still standing over my puzzle, not speaking to him, hoping he'll leave.  What makes him think he has the right to come see me anyway?  He asked if I'd be around.  I told him I'd be at Bear Lake for most of the summer, and then in New York.

At about 11:30 PM, my ex-husband says, "Oh, well, I guess I'll go now.  But Chelsea, I want to talk to you, so will you walk out with me?"

Absolutely NOT! is what I was thinking, but I walked out with him.  He told me he missed hanging out with me.  I don't miss hanging with you.  He said he didn't want me as his wife anymore, but he wanted me as a friend. I don't want you for a friend.  GET OUT OF MY LIFE!


"And um, I never said sorry to you.  I was a real jerk."

"I know."

"You agree with me?"

"Well, I wasn't going to offer it, but if you're going to say it, I'm not going to disagree with you."

My Mom yelled out the front door that someone was on the phone for me.  I thought, Who's calling me at 11:30?  She must be just trying to get me away from Nik.


I said bye to Nik, and he said, "See you around!"

I turned around, and at this point so much profanity has run through my brain that if I look back I'm afraid it will all come out.  I pride myself on being able to keep my temper.  There's few people that ever bring the worst out in me.  Up until Nik, I didn't know that kind of fury existed.  I walked in the house.   I was sick for the next two days.

We went up to Bear Lake the next day.  I calmed down from the previous night's incident.  Nik wouldn't follow me up here.  I'm safe from him.  So, the weekend went well, as did the week after it.  I've got some fun pictures of people from up there.  My Dad has this really nice Nikon camera, and I used it a lot, but then the SD card got corrupted somehow, so we've got to send it in so I can get all my pictures back.  When that happens, I'll post those pictures.  I have some pictures on my little digital camera, though, that are pretty fun, and I'll post as the highlight of this post, because there's another downer part coming.

Jason Jr., my cousin Page's kid.  He's only one, but look how big he is!

Tajsha, my cousin's other kid.  Tajsha will be three in September.

Junior on the boat for the first time.

When we went four wheeling, we encountered a wall of snow that we couldn't get around. 

So much for going to Gators in Randolph for lunch!

Snow is all over on the mountaintops.

Flowers on the road.

Mom and Bailey

The mountainside.

Bailey after the ride.

Bailey and Mom after the ride, all dirty.

Me after the ride.  You can barely tell I went, I didn't really get dusty leading the pack.

The view from our house.

A chipmunk at Minnetonka Cave.

In Minnetonka Cave.

Me and Bailey after the tour.  She'd never been in a cave before.

And guys, she's fourteen, so back off...

Then Friday came, and Bailey and I decided to make jewelry.  She was beading, and I was working on a chain mail bracelet, when I heard, "Hey guys, what's up?"  I knew the voice, but I hoped I was just dreaming.  Nope, it was Nik.  He decided to drive up to Bear Lake so he could "take me to lunch."  See, the thing about that is, I'd already told him over both email and the phone that it would never be okay for him to take me to lunch, ever.  I thought I'd sent that message very clearly.  Apparently, not.

I nearly finished my bracelet, and then changed into decent clothing (at this point I was still in pajamas).  My Mom said, "Why don't you take Witter (my cat, Lex) on a walk down the beach?  He's been wanting to go all  morning."  Side note, yes, I do take my cat up to Bear Lake with me.  He doesn't really care for the car ride (what cat does?) but he loves it once he gets to our cabin.

Well, my Mom told Nik he should go walk with me.  We went for an hour, and no more than twenty sentences were spoken, and most of them were voiced by him.  He told me he missed Bear Lake.  I told him I knew he missed the lifestyle my family afforded him.  That shut him up for awhile.  I called the kettle black.  On our walk, he picked up a stick, and then broke it up into small pieces and started throwing them at my cat!  I was really angry, and I'm pretty sure it showed, because when he saw my face he stopped throwing them until later.  The fact that he even threw another stick at Lex again after a few minutes should be a testament to how thick my ex-husband can be.

We got back to the cabin, and I tethered Lex and sat outside on a picnic table.  He finally asked, "You really think that I miss the lifestyle your family afforded me?"

"Yeah."

"Well, I don't miss it.  I'm happy with my life."

"I hope you are.  I hope you get your life put back together."

"It is put back together."

"Okay."

"So, do you want to go to lunch?"

"No."

"Oh, okay."

"You realize that the first time I told you no--over the phone--that meant no, never?"

"Well, yeah."

"Then what's all this?  You know you're never going to win me back."

At this point he got a little upset, and said, "Chelsea, I was done trying to win you back the moment I started dating Andrea."

Andrea is his ex-girlfriend now.

"Good." I said.

And that was pretty much it.  We went inside, and he talked a little longer.  I told him that the best place to get a shake in Garden City was still Hometown Drive In, and he left.  So, he drove 2 1/2 hours to come talk to me for 1 1/2, and then get a shake and drive back.  I hope he's learned his lesson.

The rest of the day was nice, however.  We went on a boat ride, and I got ridiculously sunburned.  Most of me is now tan, but there's still a bright red spot on my chest that I think is just going to peel and not tan. Oh well.  Next time I'll know to apply that 90 SPF once every two hours instead of once every four.  Saturday was full of Waverunner riding, tubing, and packing things up to leave.

Overall, it was a good trip.  I got to tan, eat good food, play in the water, oh, and I forgot to mention light some fireworks.  Then there was crocheting, watching good shows and introducing Bailey to Pinky and the Brain and the Animaniacs, laughing with family, and making jewelry.

And what else besides write this awful long post did I do today?  I made Rosemary Lemon Chicken, Rosemary Lemon Thyme Potatoes, and a Garden Salad with an herb dressing.  Tomorrow, I'm going to make a Kiwi Lime Sorbet.  I'm going to make some more mint lemonade, too.  And I plan on trying to make a Mango Sorbet and a Lemon Sorbet.  So, if you read to the end of this long post, good for you, you got to read a list of the yummy stuff I've made and will make.

And Megan, if you took the time to read all this after already hearing the narrative, bless your heart.  I'm sure that the written narrative was much easier to read, and follow, because it was minus all the profanity.

Things I've Been Up To

I've gotten into painting my toenails and doing cute designs on my big toe.  It's hard to see them, because I have a hard time focusing the camera on the little painted decal.

If you click on this one, you can get a pretty good view of the flowers on my toes.

It says kiss me above the lips.

And for Megan's birthday I pulled out my card making skills and made a couple to choose from.  I gave her the one that says 21 on the front.

I gave Megan The Spirit Thief, by Rachel Aaron, an Arctic Monkeys cd, and a gift card to Barnes and Noble and FYE.  We had yummy cake at her house (which we made), and then went to see X-Men First Class.  It was great.

Brandon Campbell enjoying the swing.

Mindy Celli and Megan Moulding loving the cat, Velcro.

Then there's Hot Tub Tuesdays, and The Mentalist, and books.  That barely offsets the crappy last week of school before finals, which will probably also be a crappy week.  So, I'm probably going to go see Thor either tomorrow or Friday to help lower the bad scale of the week.  And, if I get really into telling everyone how it is, I might post a review.

Yup, I think that's it.

Me and Finals

Finals are over, and that's a really good feeling.  Even though I don't know what my grades are for sure, I can guess.  I've got a B+ in humanities, a B+/A- in mythology, an A- in american literary history, a B+/A- in creative writing, and an A in my intro to the english language class.  I am really hoping for those two B+/A- classes to be A- because that would make my gpa a 3.35.  Then, with any luck, by the end of my Spring Term I could have a 3.4, and then I'd be on my way to writing an honors thesis.  And, that also means I will have met one of my goals for the year.

I really fret over that honors thing.  When I start something, I finish it 99.9% of the time.  That .1% of the time I don't finish something I start, I get really annoyed/upset/disappointed/angry.  So with honors, I really feel that I need to finish it, not just as a testament that I am in the top 1% (it's less than 1% that actually graduate with honors, which is weird, because it isn't THAT much extra work to do it) of my graduating class, not necessarily GPA wise, but by having original work published by the time I get my undergrad.  To me, that's huge.  And graduating with honors looks great on a resume.  In a competitive world, it's always good to have something that fantastic on a resume.

So, on that note, I'm spending the rest of the week relaxing before Spring Term starts.  I plan on crocheting, getting a much needed haircut, going to the play my brother's in at the UofU, and hanging out with Megan Moulding.  Unfortunately, I had to go to the doctor today.  Swollen lymph nodes are never fun, especially when they make it hard to breathe.  Still, now that I know what's wrong, I fully plan on taking meds and making sure I enjoy the weekend.  I have to get better anyways, since I refuse to miss class unless I'm too sick to leave the house, which I currently am not.  Speaking of which, that's another high note of this last semester.  I only missed one day of class in two of my classes.  I never missed a day in my other three classes.  I'm usually sick three or four times during a semester, and I only got sick once this semester, so I thought that was awesome.  Overall, semester success.

I got a letter from Savannah Combe, too.  She's awesome, and enjoying her mission.  I knew she would. A girl as exuberant as her will enjoy all that a mission has to offer.  Been gettin' letters from Andrew Schull as well, which is cool.  He's comin' home sometime mid-June.

And to celebrate the end of the semester, I bought Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1, and have already watched all the additional scenes.  I also bought the soundtrack to The Princess and the Frog.  I've been wanting it for awhile now, but never got it.  Worth every penny of the $16 I paid for it.


This is the catchiest tune.  I walk around singing it all the time.

My Two Most Dependable Friends

Kestin Page

It doesn't matter when I need this guy: he'll be there for me.  Although we hardly ever see each other now, he was probably my best, most truest friend in High School.  We have a lot in common.  One of my favorite things to do is just sit back in his car and listen to him while we drive around aimlessly, with his "old soul" music in the background.  Occasionally he'll call me out of the blue, and we'll update each other on what's going on (he usually has cooler stuff going on than I do) and talk about anthropology and literature.  I love this man.

This comic typifies the goings on in my relationship with Kestin.  The one asking the questions is Kestin, and the one following with the camera is me.  This is courtesy of XKCD comics.

If you want to read more about him, go here.

Megan Moulding

(Megan, I hope that you forgive my commandeering of your photo for my blog.  It's one of my favorites of you.)

I think of her like a sister.  I've known her for my entire life.  We can call each other up and ask if we want to get together to do something, and if one of us doesn't want to, we say so, and no one is offended.  My relationship with her is the most honest one that I've had in my life.  Despite the ridiculously small amount of time we actually hang out anymore (especially when I'm at home, considering we're next-door neighbors then), I never feel like I've fallen out of friendship with her.  Some of the most fun conversations I've had with her have been over Instant Messenger.  We have very similar personalities.  We never really talk about sad stuff that's going on in life, but I think that I attribute that to the personality type we are, which is more of an internalizing personality than an externalizing one.  When we do go off on rants, it's usually about the exact same thing, just different names involved.

While we're about the "reminds me of you" comics, I thought I'd take time to say that Calvin and Hobbes is the Megan comic.  There's some strips that make me laugh, because Calvin's saying things that I can picture Megan saying.

So, here's to you two, the best friends a girl could ask for.

Pulling A Jeff Murdock

If any of you ever watch the show Coupling, then you know what it is to pull a Jeff Murdock.



This is about the equivalent of what I sound like the first time I talk to a guy I'm interested in.  I can laugh at it and hurt with him at the same time.  Given, I am not like Jeff Murdock.  We all know one, though.  Megan Moulding and I know one by the name of Paul Bello, I believe.  I don't think Paul quite registers as a Patrick.

Flowrider

Flowrider was a blast tonight.  It was nothing like wakeboarding, despite what I've been told.  As I got on the board and out there, there was nothing to hang on to to keep me up!  I fell more than I stayed up.  Albeit, knowing how to stay on any type of board gives you an advantage.

Question: Did it hurt to fall?

Answer: No.  If you're worried about it, manage the fall.  By that I mean duck your head down and put your arms across your body.  It solves any awkward landings.

Question: Was it hard to stay up?

Answer: Yes, but they have a rope you can hold on to when you're learning so you can stay up longer.  As you keep going with the rope you get the hang of it and can then try it on your own.

Question: Any techniques that worked particularly well for you?

Answer:  For me, using a certain board worked better.  Also, they tell you to keep all your weight on your back foot.  This is good advice when you're slipping into the water, but not once you're in it.  Then you want to balance your weight so you don't zoom up and then back down onto the rubber, lose your balance, and fall.

And Megan Moulding, we're going to have to go do that.  It is something that you would really like to do, I just know.  Although I could do it alone, I think it is much more fun to have someone to do it with.

The Annual Carve

Megan and I got this tradition going four years ago.  I grow a bunch of pumpkins in my garden, and then the night before Halloween we choose a few and carve them.  Here's this year's finished product!

In years past we've had a lot more carved, but this year I only did one, the haunted house.  Megan did the other awesome ones.  The Tardis has to be my favorite!

Computer Savvy Cat

My cat Butterfly is able to make my computer do things I didn't even know it was capable of.  I certainly don't know how she does it.  Somehow, laying on the warm keyboard at different angles, hitting multiple keys at the same time, makes my computer go wacky.

Sure, she's done it before to my brother's HP computer.  She made the desktop screen display everything upside down.  Yes, this even changed the mouse settings.  Everything was upside down.  It took my mom a few days to even figure out how to change it.  And it was lucky she did, because my cat just kept laying on the computer and turning the desktop screen display between 90 and a full 180 degrees either way.

Lately, however, she has been laying on my macintosh whenever I leave it open.  My internet screen will show all sorts of facts about the websites where I've been, my music player will be on with a screensaver up that goes to the beat of the music, or applications I didn't even know I had will be up on the screen.  And today, once again, when I returned home from buying myself a couple more of Terry Pratchett's Discworld books*, I found her on my computer.  While I was reading a blog post, I kept hearing a noise that sounded somewhere between a cell phone ringtone and a commercial on TV for an upcoming episode.  Finally, thinking I was going insane, I hit my volume button on my computer.  Sure enough, my cat Butterfly had successfully turned on itunes and was listening to my music while she slept on the comfy, warm keyboard.

*Thanks so much for that gift card to Hastings, Megs!  I wouldn't have gone searching for more books to read if I hadn't had that.  :D

Birthday Treats

It's been a long time since I've written compared to my usual number of posts each month, but I just haven't felt like writing, and when I have, I've been in too much pain to really want to move over to my computer, so I just go to sleep.  However, I thought that I'd post some of the pictures from my birthday.

Each year I just have a small party with family and a couple close friends, which usually means just Megan on the friends side.  This year Shy came over to visit with her boyfriend for a little while.  Still, I was my same old keep it small and close self.  The only different thing was that my dad bought those candles that just keep relighting themselves.  It probably took me a minute to get them all officially blown out.

And at the next morning I found the card, candy, and a balloon on my car.